Living in fear

Tell me hotsuff, are you afraid to die? Yuck. Not a pleasant thought, eh? It doesn’t sit too well with most of us… this is probably because our inner voice starts freaking out, “Ugh! I have too much to do still!” Well alrighty then. What about this one my sunshine: are you afraid to live?

Wait… what? Of course not. Living is easy.

Isn’t it?

The other day I posted a status update on Facebook which read, “Are we afraid to die…? Or are we actually afraid to live?” It was Monday morning and was surely a bit much for the old sexy brain to start contemplating, but I couldn’t help but think about it… How are we living our lives?

A lot of people live in fear, whether they realize it or not. And I’m not talking “fear” as in, afraid that they will walk out on to the street, be hit by a bus and die. While it certainly would be a bummer, (look both ways before you cross!) that is not quite the fear I am getting at. What I mean is a fear of trusting people, fear of meeting new people, fear of rejection in the dating game, fear of asking for something, and not recieving it. And instead of living in a way that puts them at “risk”, most people choose a safe zone, which is usually not to risk at all. This safe zone allows them to stay with in their bubble to do what’s comfortable, what’s predictable, or what’s “expected” of them by society or family.

How is that really living? It’s not. It’s harding even existing.

Think about this for a moment… Are you that person? The person who wants to start a blog, but you are “worried” no one will read it or that it won’t be “as good” as what is already out there? Are you that person who would love to be in a romantic relationship, but are “skeptical” that there are no good men/women left and that you will end up heartbroken? Are you that person who is bored out of your mind at work, in your relationship, or just in your day-to-day life, but can’t get yourself to leave or change, because of obligations you feel are expected of you?

This is fear. It is also excuses you are using to be safe. And it is a sad way to live your life.

Maybe you will tell me you are not afraid to live… that you will risk and will venture outside of your comfort zone in pursuit of happiness. Woo! That’s great my dear. High five to you! But wait… and it’s not that I don’t believe you… but let me ask you something. Do your actions and decisions reflect that belief you have about how you live your life?

I know right? Pretty heavy stuff.

When you are on your death bed, I don’t believe you will be laying there thinking, “Oh man, I wish I didn’t take so many risks, even though some worked out, some didn’t. I really wish I would have just stayed in my bubble, in my comfort zone, where it was safe and predictable.” Nope, that’s not likely. What is likely is that you will be reflecting back on all that your sexylicious self did, all you risked, all you loved, and hopefully you will be thinking it was all worth it.

Because it is. It always is always worth it.

Look at the fear you are living with and consider taking the appropriate steps you need to take in order to step out and really start living. Go do the things you want to do, try the things you want to try and if it doesn’t work out, just keep going. All the admirable friends, celebrities and public figures you look up to started out just like you and I. They too experienced fear. But the difference is they pushed passed it. And look at them now. Could that be you?

The truth is simple. In this life, as you risk and take chances, you could be treated like garbage. You could be rejected. You could be hurt. But, you could also be treated like gold. You could be embraced. You could be loved.

Is that not at least worth the shot?

You have one go at this life, make it worth it! Ditch the excuses and the fear. Get out there and leave your mark. And for petes sake, give us something to talk about at your funeral. 😉

Sending love, hugs and butt slaps


“The question is not, will you survive if you step out of your comfort zone… the question is, will you survive your comfort zone?”


  1. Yes, I have been living in fear of just about everything you listed throughout this. I’ve only really been starting to move into some things I want to try in the last six months. I fear what others think of me, what they might think of my goals, how they see me, think of me. I don’t share this with others really. Don’t want them to know. I stutter when I’m nervous and I don’t like talking to new people. This can come off as creepy and I know it so I’m working on it.

    Getting out of the safety bubble is definately a major hurdle. It is much easier to live like a hermit. Boring as hell but easier. And I have mastered making excuses to try and stay that way. The main one being that I feel like everybody has their own perfect little worlds and I would be imposing or interrupting if I get in their way so I shouldn’t interject. How do you start conversations with strangers anyway unless you have a reason?

    I needed heart surgery when I was 15. I didn’t expect to live much past that so fear of death has always been on my mind since I was a kid. I wouldn’t call it fear though, more like a nagging discomfort. Like an ache you’re aware of but can never really get rid of. Something you focus on whenever you’re not focused. So I haven’t really made plans in my life, but I’m trying to change that now. I needed shoulder surgery a few years back fixing mishaped shoulder blades and stopping repeated dislocations. So now that’s done and I’m lifting weights five days a week to pull everything together. Hopefully once everything is where I need it I want to start mma training, see where that goes.

    Reading your post was weird because it was one of those “just what I needed today” kind of things. Thanks for writing this. Also I hope this was ok. I don’t want people thinking I’m a nut… Even though I guess I am.

    Love and hugs are fine, as for the butt slaps, I am not a piece of meat.

  2. Thanks for sharing… I hope you continue to burst the bubble and jump the hurdle. The fact that you acknowledge and are working towards what you want to change is huge. If you feel up for it, maybe read the post I wrote called “One Thing Daily.” 🙂 I think you may get something from that as well…

    As for “interrupting” somebody’s “perfect little world”… well… maybe think instead that you could be enhancing and adding to it. You never know who may need you. Kinda like when I wrote this post… I could have wasted a lot of peoples time by asking them to read it… or, I could have found myself accidently helping them… providing a “just what I needed” solution. 🙂

    …MMA training. DO it. It’s hard, but it’s fun. Listen to your body, and listen to what pulls you. When you are ready, you will know.

    Keep on trucking. You rock just the way you are. Love and hugs. 😉

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